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Motivation

How To Keep On Going After the Death of a Loved One

It’s been an intense year of ups and downs. Thoughts of gratitude, everything happens for a reason and life is too short running through my mind. Everyone grieves differently. Anyone who is smart enough to understand that or who has first hand been through the death of a loved one would know that everyone grieves differently. It saddens me when I hear people say things like, “oh look at how much she cried”, “look at what she’s doing” etc. This judgement is unnecessary and actually shows the lack of compassion and empathy one has in them. No one has said anything to me, but I’ve been to many funerals now, and this seems to be happening a lot not only at funerals but any kind of gathering.

Are there a lack of things for you to talk about? That you must compare, compete and put down others with your unnecessary judgement and opinions? Because anyone in their right mind would know that it is their own faults, negativity and guilt that comes through in such negative mentions. I felt compelled to write this because it’s been a week and I’ve been struggling with getting back into my routine, and you know what one of the things that really kept going through my mind was? If I continue on living, and pick up where I left off…

what will people say?

HOW TO KEEP ON GOING AFTER A DEATH OF A LOVED ONE

When our brother passed away I wanted to give up on everything. Can I just not go to work and completely go dark on social media? And now our father passed away and all those feelings have rushed back but even darker. I was on the brink of losing sight of what this life is all about. Of course, I’ll never forget them. I’m praying for them both every day. I do my part in keeping them in my thoughts, do good in their name and everything and anything else I could do to respect the lives that they once had. But why is it so important for society to know exactly what it is that I’m doing? Fortunately, being on full blast on social media breaks those barriers to a certain extent and some of you who watch my Instagram stories, or see what I post to know what’s going on. But I’d like to remind you, that this is a mere 10% of my life. There is so much going on in the background. Some days I open up and show you 30%, especially if I believe it’s something you can all benefit and learn from.

So here I am, at a fork in the road where I thought if I don’t lift myself up and get back into the routine that I love then I’m going into the darkness.

Life is too short.

But what about, Balance.

Balance is the solution. Living a balanced life of remembering those we have lost, with prayer and good deeds, doing what we love and spending time with our loved ones. Find your balance.  If there is one thing I could say to pass on the advice of when you’re struggling with moving forward after losing a loved one, I would say… find your balance. Don’t worry about what others are saying. Pick up where you left off, do MORE good, remember others and those who are negative, enlighten them with your kindness by being positive around them. Because those are the people who need it the most.

Please remember my brother Muhammed Usman in your prayers and my father Mian Muhammad Rauf.
May they both rest in peace in Jannah Firdaws.

 

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Motivation

Bloggers: Writers, Photographers and Ultimate Content Creators

I’ve been blogging for 3 years and my first social media platform (among the popular ones these days) was go figure, YouTube! The first video I ever uploaded was actually of my first kitten, falling off my desk. It was an accident and I happened to get it on camera. I want to also add that I was young and did not think she would fall off the table.

*no judge zone*

I started blogging a lot more regularly on my first maternity leave. Now that I’m on my second maternity leave, blogging has been what has kept me sane. Getting back into work mode, to come back out of it in less than 2 years can really do a toll on you. Especially mentally. So this time around I’ve been partnering, collaborating and really getting to know the business side of the blogging world. However, this doesn’t mean I say yes to everything that comes my way. There are have been many collaboration requests that I’ve turned down, due to them not matching my lifestyle, ethics or simply I can’t relate to the product or service and know for sure I would not like it. Also, if by chance I’m wrong with a collaboration and the product or service is not what I expected, I explain to the brand why and I don’t write about it. After all, not worth my time. But there was that time when I had that experience at a cafe where I wasn’t allowed to bring my stroller in and wrote about it. Hmm. So i guess it depends. It’s all in the writing. You choose whether you want to be civil and positive or get nasty. But remember, your writing, is your voice online.

READ MORE: WHY THERE WERE NO STROLLERS ALLOWED

Everyday I’m learning something new, meeting new people and of course doing the mom thing at the same time.

blogging
Wearing a Mockberg watch with a mesh band

 

It’s not as glamorous as it seems. It’s a lot of work. Blogging is more than a nice Instagram picture and a 200+
word blog post. You’ve gotta be passionate about what you do. Without passion, one day you’ll wake up and not want to do it anymore. I’ve seen many blogs just die off after a few years. I use to wonder, what happened? Why did you stop? But really, it could be anything. No more drive, never really loved writing or simply was in it for the money and realized that doesn’t just show up without putting in the work.

Think of it this way, when a book is written. How do you think the author starts? They brainstorm. They imagine the characters. A rough story line. They write their thoughts out. Then comes the first draft. Second, third and maybe fourth draft. Someone reads it. Critiques it. Spell check. A million more spell checks. A rough copy is printed. Do you want it to be an e-book, hard copy, soft copy etc. Okay, my point is… there is SO much work that goes into blogging before you can really feel like it’s “working”.  The day I started not caring about that stuff and went back to why I really started blogging, it was all smooth sailing from there. Do it for the love of writing, helping people, teaching, photography and kick ass content creation. This is your project it. OWN IT.

So what does a day in maternity life and blogging look like?

Bloggers: Writers, Photographers and Ultimate Content Creators

blogging

 

6 – 7 AM : I’ve never in my life woken up so early until now. I guess two children will do that to you? I nurse my baby and most of the time she falls back asleep. I take some time to catch up to emails, message, social media and then wake up my toddler for breakfast.

8 – 10 AM: I drop off the little guy to daycare and then from there is when our day really starts for me and baby z. Sometimes we go grocery shopping, downtown for blogging events or to see my mom, or straight back home to get started on house chores or writing up my next blog post.

12 PM: LUNCH – Usually homemade if I don’t have plans or haven’t been busy running errands. #momlife

canadian blogger

 

1 – 5 PM: Between these hours is when I really get busy with blogging. Unless I’m nursing, at an event or seeing friends. I also get some exercise during these hours. If I miss the window to exercise then I wait till later in the evening. Either go for a family walk in the neighborhood or laps inside the house.

First steps in blogging:

Always start with notes for your blog post. Then a draft. Proof read as many times as you can. Take a day or two away from it and then look at it again. (Fact: This post was written in a totally different angle and was changed a few hours before being posted.) Then post! I find one of the biggest advantages to nursing my baby is sometimes I have a hand free to write my notes or first drafts. 

I try to keep a schedule but because babies and life is so unpredictable, it doesn’t always turn out that way. Sometimes I’m writing like a maniac at 1 AM. I’ve always enjoyed writing and so there is never a good time or a bad time to write. I just do it. So for those who are just starting off, my advice to you is to just do it. That is if you enjoy writing. If you don’t that could be a whole other struggle and I’ll save those tips for another blog post.


For the bloggers: Next time you tell someone you’re a blogger, remember everything you do to be a kick ass blogger. Whether you organize photo shoots with photographers, take your own pictures, partnerships, collaborations, editing, writing… you’re the whole works!

For the readers: Blog posts take time and in our writing there is a story, a voice or a message. When you take the time to read my blog posts I am extremely grateful towards you. You took the time to read it, allow me to thank you and to recognize who you are. Leave me a comment on social media, on the blog or even a private message.

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Motivation

Time Management with Bloom Daily Planners [MOTIVATION]

There’s not enough time in the day for me to do everything I want to do. However, for some reason when I have a check list, it can all get done. Ever since I was a teenager I had a habit of making lists in my planners. A list of goals, a list of daily things to do and a favourites list (music, books) to download and to borrow from the library.

daily planner

Time Management with Bloom Daily Planners

Now those lists have evolved and the amount of lists I have to make is overwhelming. So overwhelming that I haven’t done it in almost a year. I actually think I was a lot more successful in getting things done because I had a daily planner or book to write everything down in. Now with my baby brain syndrome (it’s real), I forget everything! I’ve been looking for the right planner to get me organized again for a long time. And now finally I have the Bloom Daily Planner to help me get back into a more organized life.

marble monthly plannermonthly planners

The Bloom Daily Planners come in many forms. You can get it in hard cover or soft, monthly planning or daily, You can even get specific ones: Teacher planner, student planner and a wedding planner. They have a lot to choose from, check it out here.

Monthly planner in marble and some fun stickers.^

When I saw these stickers it instantly reminded me of my old agenda from high school. I’d decorate every week with fun stickers and looking back at it now, it’s almost like looking into a diary/scrapbook. Looking at a list, or a page full of words of appointments, to do or birthdays is boring. So why not make it more fun by adding cute stickers. Especially for things you want to bring attention to when going through the pages.

budget planner

blogger planner

The monthly planner I have is a soft cover planner. When you open the soft cover, the inside of it has an area where you can slide your receipts or loose paper in.

For each day of the month I set goals. Mom goals, work goals, blogger goals, fitness goals or whatever. Set one for each day and whenever you accomplish that goal for that day, check it off. It may sound silly to you, but in hindsight when you go back to your planner in a week and see that you didn’t meet any of your goals, it might spark some new found motivation. For myself, I treat it like a challenge. Meeting my daily goals and checking it off at the end of the day is enough motivation for me. Looking back at a month of checks, is like a big “YES, girl! YES!’

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Motherhood

Postpartum Fitness: 5 Steps to Getting into an Exercise Routine

exercise routine

It is now 12 weeks since I had my baby girl. I’m itching to get back into an exercise routine. To be honest, I never really had a “routine”. Being active was second nature to me and I never really put any effort into staying healthy or to stay the XS small size I had a love/hate relationship with. Okay, please don’t kill me for saying this. For years I would have trouble gaining weight. This is before I had children. “You have a fast metabolism”, they said.

Fast forward after having two under two, and I’m having trouble losing it. Of course it’s in all the wrong places. My friends and I have countless times joked about a machine that could suck it out from one place and put it in another. Funny enough I found out a month ago a friend of a friend of mine actually did that and such technology exists! Crazyyy. And no, I wouldn’t try it. Surgery scares me. So here goes my steps to getting into an exercise routine:

Postpartum Fitness: 5 Steps to Getting into an Exercise Routine

STEP 1
Don’t start until you’ve healed and/or have stopped bleeding. Also, if you’re nursing, you don’t want to go to heavy either. You need to stay hydrated and not lose too much weight too fast. Some doctors say it could affect your milk production. Always check with your doctor before you do anything. Every body is made different and handles exercise differently too. Be safe!

STEP 2
Get some workout clothes you feel comfortable in. I shopped online and got some stuff from Shein.
The tights were great for my yoga routine and also wear really well if you have to go somewhere after. For a quick top to get on after your workout to look fly af, I paired it with my favourite white tank with the black lace.
Click images below to shop
shein tank top lace

STEP 3
Before you do any core workouts find out if you have diastasis recti, commonly known as abdominal separation. A diastasis is defined as a separation of the rectus abdominis muscle into right and left halves. Ask a doctor to check or check yourself here.

STEP 4
Create a schedule.
Monday – Morning Run/Walk
Tuesday – Rest
Wednesday – Backyard Yoga
Thursday – Rest
Friday – Morning Run/Walk
Weekend – Circuit workouts

STEP 5

Stay motivated. This will be the hardest step. You’ll want to give up and just cuddle and take those naps with your little one instead of working out while they sleep. But don’t fall into that rut. Stay motivated by finding new challenging workouts or don’t discourage yourself with things you can’t do yet and instead just go for a walk.

How do you stay motivated to get some exercise? Comment below with your tips! #Notgonnalie – I need that motivation right now.

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Motivation

Stand Together For Anti Bullying

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#StandTogether is about recognizing our diversity, embracing our differences, and coming together in solidarity to prevent bullying.

I remember every single person who bullied me. Those are memories that are hard to forget. The sad part about majority reason of why children get bullied is that it’s because the person doing the bullying doesn’t know any better. Mostly they’re afraid of what they don’t know, or don’t understand.

Long story short, once upon a time I wore a hijab. Although I went to a very multicultural elementary school downtown Toronto, there were a few children who just didn’t understand why I wore it, didn’t want to learn and just felt better by calling me and my friends names, physically abusing us and just making our lives miserable. It went on for months until we stood up to the bullies. We didn’t want it to come down to fighting back, but it did. After that day, that was the end of it. Or so I thought.

First year of high school, I remember someone in Science class asking if I was bald underneath. Stupid question because I unfortunately never wore my hijab perfectly covering my hair. The worse part was that the Science teacher responded with ” …is it true? Are you all bald underneath?” Like what the —?? At that time because of all the bullying I had been through prior to high school, that comment meant nothing to me. I was numb to bullying and just answered the question with a mundane “No.” 

#DidYouKnow 70% of reported bullying is because they either look or act differently? (race, weight, height, clothing, and any physical, religious and sexual differences.)

No one should be bullied and schools should have more programs that help students being bullied and help everyone understand the importance of why bullying is wrong. In elementary school when I addressed the bullying that happened to our vice principle, he created a mediation program. Where volunteers were given whistles/school bells and would walk around at recess time keeping the peace. If they found a situation where someone was being bullied we would blow the whistle or school bell and teachers would come take over. Proud to say my friends and I were the first people at our elementary school to be a part of it.

What I love about this campaign is that the money is to go towards educating students to understand that we are all the same. The same people but in different bodies. Check out this video. 

Open your mind. 

#standtogether

So why the funky green socks? They’re to represent that we are all unique and this is what makes us amazing individuals! You can purchase these socks at YoSox on Queen Street, or online. For every pair of socks purchased, Yo Sox will donate a portion of the proceeds to Canadian Safe School Network to help fund new anti-bullying programs for youth and to promote wellness.

Teachers/School Professionals: Here’s the link to some #StandTogether Educational Resources to add valuable lessons about bullying, diversity, and kindness into your classroom!

You can donate to the Canadian Safe School Network, here.

 

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How To Deal With And Catch Social Media Trolls

social media trolls

What is a Social Media Troll?

Someone who creates conflict on sites like Twitter, Facebook, Instagram and blogs by posting messages that are particularly controversial or inflammatory with the sole intent of provoking an emotional (read: angry) response from other users. – Google

These social media trolls are lurking everywhere on the web and most are full of anger and jonzing to discourage people from just about anything they love. So according to google’s translation of a social media troll, these trolls create conflict with messages, but the trolls have upgraded to trolling a few more ways.

[Tweet “What is a #socialmedia troll? Here’s how you can catch/deal with these trolls:”]

Types of Social media trolls:

Comment trolls – They leave negative unnecessary comments anywhere they see the option to comment.

Post trolls – These trolls probably have subscribed to your blog just so they can be the first to comment under your post with links to their own websites, viruses etc.

Stalker trolls – They stalk your social media accounts everyday but never like or comment on any of your posts.

 

How do you catch/deal with trolls?

 

  1. Don’t feed the comment trolls. On Twitter if someone is being Negative+Sarcastic, then you can reply in a Sarcastic+Funny tone to make light of the situation. If it’s on Instagram just delete their comment (you don’t need to see that comment again) and then do your IG fam a favour and block them.
  2. Why do you post your site links when most commenting platforms allow you to make your name link-able after you’ve commented? It won’t help your SEO situation, so stop. Set yourself up with a spam blocker and a commenting system that allows you to approve the comment before it goes live.
  3. Your like or comment won’t make that person insta-famous. Collectively maybe. I’ll be honest. I’ve seen some blurry IG pics or where the image should have been rotated to be right side up, but I still liked it. But then again I go a little like crazy and go on liking sprees. If you really want to know your stalker trolls, you can try to catch them by putting your account on private and see who sends you a follow request. Chances are your stalker trolls don’t follow you and will now try too. For those who do follow you and don’t like, favourite, re-tweet etc…relax, they either didn’t see your post or it sucks and you need to re-think your approach. Trial and error my friends.

 

Trollers gonna troll, so do you and carry on.

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Motivation

2014 Round-Up

happy new year

wise words

Here we are in the New Year! Time for a 2014 Round-Up. It’s been a busy year and I can’t wait to start 2015 off with even more to do. Currently in nesting mode and getting ready to go from a family of two to three, setting goals and renovating our place are just some of the things on my to do list for January. Have you set any goals for the New Year?

Thank you for all of your love and support, that continues to motivate and inspire me!

 

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my cat beep

tokyo robot restaurant

gustos toronto

ysl

 

 

Most popular blog posts of 2014:

Pantene Hair

Guide to Contouring for different face shapes

The Boyfriend Coat

Caramelized Apple French Toast

Social Marketing Universe

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November
Events

Goodbye November! Hello December!

November

November was amazing! What a month, full of adventure, meeting new people, travelling with my love, spending time with my besties and soaking in lots of information.  Have you ever wondered why you have more busier and productive months than others? It’s actually very simple. You invest your time to be at places where you’ll get opportunities or that may encourage you to find them = a busier month.

It’s so easy to get stuck in a rut and find yourself going through your day, weeks, months and years in the same schedule, saying the same things. Things like, “I can’t wait to do this..” or “I’m going to build/make/start….” and then not do anything at all. Why do this to yourself? Essentially you’re holding yourself back. I’m sure you can think of a million and one reasons of why you are and how hard it is to start. Really, all it takes is you beating on your craft, talent and beating, beating until something comes out of it. Metaphorically speaking of course.

You’ll see that managing your life, your schedule and when you have time for particular projects will all lay out the way you want them too. November was a jam packed month for me, because I made the time for these events and I allowed the opportunities to come to me by being present. Whether it’s being present at a networking event, present on your social platforms or present to sit down and work hard at what you do best. Just be present. Put everything else you have on hold, if it really means a lot to you and you really want it. Everything else can wait.

November in a nut shell:

South Korea/Japan Trip

November started off with this amazing two week trip. I’ve posted a KYOTO OOTD and a summary of the famous Naksan Park in South Korea but that’s just the tip of the iceberg. I have so much more to share about this trip. I can’t wait for all these posts to go up. The cultures, people and experiences were amazing. People have asked me, would you go back? I most definitely, would.

Spark Sessions

First weekend back I was ready for a bloggers conference like no other. I was a bit sceptical at first, whether I should attend this event due to the agenda. I felt as if I already had a good idea of where I wanted my blog to go, what I was going to do in terms of short/long term goals and all that technical stuff I had down due to my experience with web and social media. After all, my day time job is being an Online Marketing Specialist. However this weekend was more than a weekend of passing knowledge. It was an opportunity to meet industry people, people I’ve already spoken to via emails, tweets and other forms of online communications. Best of all I met some great bloggers!

spark sessions

 

Google HQ

I’ve always wanted to go to Google HQ ever since the first tech site wrote about how modern and funky their offices are. Particularly the silicone valley head office. Especially if you’ve seen this movie:

 

Read more about my Digital Day at Google here.

Miracle 10 Bloggers Event

Miracle 10 is a line of clinical skin care products formulated by The Plastic Surgery Clinic in Yorkville. There’s so much to do in Yorkville. Shopping, restaurants and lots of boutiques. I’ve been to a few different hair dressers and spa’s in Yorkville and none have really stuck to me, where I felt like, I’m definitely coming back to this place. I’ve been using Miracle 10 products for 3 days now and I’ve got to say that I’m impressed. I’m using the Miracle 10 products for a 10 day challenge and can’t wait to share the results!

 

Elle Magazine VIP event

What a great event! I can’t wait for the next Elle Magazine VIP event. Events like these are the best to go with your girl friends. It makes for the perfect outing. Best combo to a great night out is a group activity and then food. Here’s the full post.

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Motivation

Blog-aversary – Thanks to YOU.

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“One year ago today I turned on my laptop and decided I was going to share a piece of my world with YOU.”

 

Our time on earth, well.. we don’t know how long we have. I know, that’s deep of me to say. But think about it. What are you leaving behind? What do YOU want to leave behind? Your knowledge, a product, an invention or an idea? This blog was just the beginning of something. Something that may grow into anything I want it to be. Anything YOU want it to be. If you want, you can look at my blog as an avenue to stay updated to Social Media Marketing, get some style inspiration out of my ‘outfit of the day’ posts or get a chuckle out of how silly I can be on camera talking about beauty products or doing a challenge. Whatever it may be, YOU are the reason my blog is where it is today. YOU motivate me.

It’s hard to believe that my blog has hit that one year mark since I wrote my first post. After launching my blog and hearing great feedback from subscribers, social media followers, friends and family, I thought to myself, I really wish I had created this blog a long time ago! The events I went to, the beauty products I got to try way before the public even knew about them during my beauty advisor days and managing my start-up would’ve made for great posts and knowledge to pass on to my readers. However, aside from the could’ve, should’ve, would’ves this is one of the best things I ever decided to do.

CUPCAKE HUMJK

I’ve been blessed with a ‘writer’s block’ free year, and instead a year full of opportunities, collaborations and ideas. I have met some wonderful people who know me through my blog, Instagram or YouTube (you know who you are), and it has motivated me to put out posts that you love to read. I’m confident the second year blogging will be full of kick ass content. So join me and subscribe, follow for updates of whatever I concoct and put up on the web next!

Thank you so much everyone for such a great year!

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Black & White: Items for motivation

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It’s easy to get into a rut and struggle with being able to do anything due to the lack of motivation you’re feeling.

Whether it’s because you’re not feeling well, working hard 9-5 and have the burn out blues or just plain old lazy.

When lacking motivation I like to set up my desk area with things that will motivate me and give me that extra energy or push to get my mind back into full swing.

Smoothie for thought

Find ingredients that’ll give you a burst of energy. Here’s a recipe I came up with:
hum jk motivation
Handful of blueberries
2 ice cubes
1 teaspoon of chia seeds
1 and half mango cut into cubes
half a cup of milk

Put everything into your blender (I used my magic bullet) and blend away! Instant energy booster.

I love staying up to date with Fashion and the most current trends. I’ve subscribed to some of my favourite magazines and when I have a chance I sit down and read them all. A lot of the times some of the articles spark ideas and I go on a photo and writing frenzy.

Scents can really wake you up! Whether it’s a fragrance or a scented candle. I love Guerlain! My Insolence isn’t everyone’s cup of tea because of its unique scent, but fresh flowers is a good alternative.

hum jk motivation 3

Writing down your ideas and starting a brainstorming session makes a huge difference. I have a few notebooks where I keep all of my ideas. One of my favourites is a moleskin notebook. I keep one in my purse at all times. It’s great for when you come up with an idea on the go. Writing it down vs typing it in your phone feels a lot safer, private and can trigger even more ideas. I’m pen happy, so it works for me.
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What gives you instant energy and motivation?

 

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